WARNING: This video contains extremely explicit language and is NSFW! Seriously, we warned you!
In cased you missed it, an INSANE email written by an angry sorority girl at the University of Maryland has recently been making a splash on the internet as she goes on a potty-mouthed rant and lashes out at her sisters for their awkward behavior during Greek Week!
The letter is overflowed with vulgar language as she hurls insult after insult at the girls, but to be honest with you, reading it off a computer screen doesn’t quite do it justice. So the geniuses over at FunnyOrDie.com recruited the help of the brilliant MichaelShannon to read the hilarious email aloud, and the results are AH-mazing!
Ch-ch-check out the actor as he loses his sh*t (above)!
Michael is set to play the villain, General Zod in the upcoming Superman flick, Man of Steel, and this is a PERFECT sneak peek of his evil side as he captures the fury of the enraged sister while sippin’ on some booze!
Seriously, we can’t decide whether we should be horrified or laughing our asses off, so we’ll just go with both! LOLz!!
And here’s another example for why country-rap crossover songs are the worst. (I will eat every single one of my words if Dolly Parton and Khia put out a song together). In Brad Paisley’s new song “AccidentalRacist,” he starts out telling a story about how a dude at Starbucks threw a side-eye at the Confederate flag t-shirt he was wearing. Brad wants that dude to know that he wasn’t declaring his love for slavery by wearing that shit, he was just declaring his love for Skynyrd. Then Brad goes on to sing about how it’s hard being white before LL Cool J comes in and raps about how it’s hard being black and they both go on and on about how we need to stop judging each other. It’s like a bizarro remake of Ebony and Ivory. The chorus goes like this:
I’m just a white man comin’ to you from the south land tryin’ to understand what it’s like not to be. I’m proud of where I’m from but not everything we’ve done. It ain’t like you and me can rewrite history.
Our generation didn’t start this nation. We’re still pickin’ up the pieces, walkin’ on eggshells, fightin’ over yesterday.
Caught between southern pride and southern blame.
And LL Cool J raps out the lines “If you don’t judge my do-rag, I won’t judge your red flag” and “If you don’t judge my gold chains, I’ll forget the iron chains.” Fuckery everywhere!
I just think art has a responsibility to lead the way, and I don’t know the answers, but I feel like asking the question is the first step, and we’re asking the question in a big way. How do I show my Southern pride? What is offensive to you? And he kind of replies, and his summation is really that whole let’s bygones be bygones and ‘If you don’t judge my do rag, I won’t judge your red flag.’ We don’t solve anything, but it’s two guys that believe in who they are and where they’re from very honestly having a conversation and trying to reconcile.
“I’m with my audience 100 percent in the Southern pride thing, in the same way that a Yankees fan is very proud of where he’s from — that’s LL. We’ve got pictures of him in a New York Yankees cap doing his vocal, which is so appropriate. “But, you know, it’s such a complicated issue — I’m reading up on it now, [since] I felt I needed to be well-armed for any discussion – and here he is in a Yankees cap, and you think to yourself, ‘Well here is the antithesis of what was the problem.’ But it’s not. New York City was all for slavery. They actually voted 60 percent against — or maybe 70 against — Abraham Lincoln because they didn’t like the idea of slavery going away because there goes cotton and there goes tobacco trade, you know what I mean? It’s very hypocritical to feel like it’s just the South’s fault.
“But, at the same time, symbols mean things, and I know one thing: It just doesn’t do any good to blatantly do things and be like, ‘Just get over it.’ That’s not what we’re saying. This is a very sensitive subject, and we’re trying to have the discussion in a way that it can help.”
If Brad and LL Cool J really wanted to end racism through song, they should’ve just done a cover of this: