What is a rose without its scent? What is a shark with no teeth? What is Fifty Shades of Grey without the sex??
We don’t know, and we’re not sure we want to.
Removing all of the sex scenes from Fifty Shades of Grey might seem like blasphemy, but that’s exactly what the censored Vietnamese version did! For a movie that’s mostly sex, that’s a pretty big chunk of film.
Apparently, over 20 minutes of material was removed the movie, making its ending super confusing.
Xuan Thao, who saw the censored version, said:
“It’s totally ridiculous. This version is rated 16+, but it doesn’t need an age restriction; a 5-year-old could watch it. Even the trailer was sexier. They’d have been better banning it altogether.”
Yeah, that pretty much hits the nail on the head.
Cutting the sex from Fifty Shades is like cutting the dinosaurs from Jurassic Park. It’d look like a movie about an island theme park that has a power failure that makes everyone panic so much people start dying.
[ Related: Schoolboy Sent Home For Dressing Like Christian Grey! ]
While Vietnam could’ve banned the movie like India, Indonesia, Cambodia or Malaysia, they didn’t and so their people at least got to see them some shirtless Jamie Dornan.
We think that’s a fiiiine consolation prize! LOLz!
[Image via Universal Pictures.]
We should all be so lucky when getting arrested. LOLz!
A woman in Sinaloa, western Mexico was enjoying Fifty Shades of Grey a little bit too much in the theater. While the film was playing, the 33-year-old was caught playing with herself in the 12th row.
[ Related: Malin Akerman Shares A 50 Shades Of Grey Throwback Featuring A Very Naked Jamie Dornan! ]
Then, instead of depriving her of any roughness, the cops decided to arrest her for masturbation, and cuff her, nearly completing the fantasy she was trying to live out anyway!
So, some might say this law breaker had a happy ending!
The biggest mystery, of course, is how she was caught masturbating over the sound of everyone else masturbating — it was a showing of Fifty Shades, after all! HA!
Whoa, there’s almost as much naked Jamie Dornan in this photo as you’d see in Fifty Shades of Grey!
Malin Akerman shared a throwback pic of herself and Jamie in an Abercrombie & Fitch ad circa 2002…
And well, it looks like Mr. Grey will see you now, because you can almost see all of him.
[ Related: Dakota Johnson Reportedly Breaks Up With Boyfriend Matthew Hitt! ]
Along with this photo, Malin shared this HIGHlarious caption:
“#tbt to the very naked cover of Abercrombie circa 2002 (?) w none other than Mr Grey himself @jamiedornan #50shadesofgrey #nakedisthebestwaytosellclothes ?!”
It’s also a pretty point. How is not wearing clothes the best way to sell clothes?
[Image via Instagram.]
Ashley Greene is living up to her last name for the sake of the environment!
In this EXCLUSIVE clip, we chatted with the beautiful 27-year-old at Global Green USA’s 12th Annual Pre-Oscar Party — which had a very appropriate green carpet!
[ Video: EXCLUSIVE! Daniel Franzese Shares Memories From Mean Girls! ]
Given that it’s awards season, we dished with the actress on what film she is rooting for to win gold at the Oscars!
Also, considering her breakout performance was in Twilight, we wanted to know her thoughts on Fifty Shades Of Grey, which is based off fan fiction of Stephanie Meyer‘s hit series!
Will she see the steamy flick?!
To hear the answers to all of these questions and more, ch-ch-check out the clip (above)!
This probably spiced up some people’s morning commutes!
While 50 Shades of Grey is busy breaking box office records, it’s also making news in a rather random way.
That’s because one drive-in theater in Sacramento, Cali. accidentally screened the sexy movie over President’s Weekend where everyone on the highway could see!
[ Related: 50 Shades Of Grey Breaks Box Office Records! ]
Apparently, the WestWind All Digital Drive-In Theater‘s screens were so prominent, that people driving down Highway 50 could see what Dakota Johnson and Jamie Dornan were doing!
We seriously can’t make this stuff up!!!
Luckily, the speed limit of 70mph made it hard for any drivers to actually get a good enough glimpse to see anything too scandalous.. But it’s still probably best that the rated R movie be out of view from any younger passengers traveling down the coast!
Who didn’t see this coming?!
50 Shades of Grey has enjoyed a HUGE weekend at the box office, not only because it opened on Valentine’s Day Eve, but also because it’s a holiday weekend!
And they made out like bandits with riding crops!
[ Related: 50 Shades Of Grey's Reviews Are In! See What The Critics Had To Say! ]
Universal is reporting that it will rake in .67M over three days, and .658M over four days, screening in 3,646 theaters.
This is the best President’s Day weekend opening record EVER!
Congrats to everyone involved with the film! You have titillated a nation and made millions doing it!