This A list mostly movie actor is set to debut his new “girlfriend” just in time for Father’s Day and photos of them with his family. (CDAN)
Tommy Girl! My guesses as to who his next beard is are: Julianne Hough, Taylor Swift (she likes ‘em fresh out of the vagina, but she’d be willing to go with TG if it gets her into the Beard Hall of Fame), Minka Kelly (because her acting skills aren’t going to get her starring roles), Justin Bieber or John Travolta in drag.
Which (in)famous dad of a trouble prone Hollywood actress had a pearl inserted in into his man parts as a teenager?
But unlike Demi Moore’s yoga-teaching boy toy Will Hanigan, who had the pearl inserted due to a farming tradition, boasting it’d give girls extra stimulation in the bedroom, this C-List celebrity did not follow such a tradition.
“He boasts that he and his pals did it when they were in the early teens,” reveals a source. (Naughty But Nice Rob)
Michael Lohan? If it is, I’m surprised he hasn’t had it removed, got his entire family to sign it and sold it on eBay. Oh hell, I’m giving him ideas…
This A list rapper said it was worth it to him because he always wanted to have sex with this former A list reality star/celebrity and now just an annoying name. Plus, if he makes a few bucks, then it will be a win/win. It is never a win/win when you have sex with her. Ever. (CDAN)
Lil Wayne and Wonky McValtrex? Lil Wayne is as fertile as a dozen KFeds, so if for some reason they do it, she will get knocked up. And in 9 months, we’ll all be running down the street for our lives as a giant sizzurp-filled herp sore with legs and a gold grill chases after us.
These two talented young performers would like you to think that they met after they became part of the same show.
Not true! They actually met – and dated – a couple of years before that.
Why not just admit that they knew and dated each other in the past? Well, because their current project demands that they be perceived as young and hot and available. If people knew that they had dated, it would spoil the illusion.
Besides, their management doesn’t want anyone to know that they are gay. That’s right. These performers are the same gender! And they are still very, very attracted to each other. It’s too bad management won’t let them live their lives openly and honestly, because they make one really cute couple! (Blind Gossip)
Harry and Louis from One Erection?
Dlisted – Be Very Afraid
She hates the paps, and she’s been burned by the paps. So now she’s dealing with the paps and is working exclusively with one agency, agreeing to give them photos on a regular basis. The agreement started several months ago when she approached one agency in exchange for information on a paparazzo working for another agency. She wanted names, plates, any details available, presumably in hopes of either legal retribution, if possible, and illegal retribution, if necessary. Very gangster.
The only problem with making this kind of arrangement is that you have to deliver. And if you don’t deliver as often as the paps want, and on the kind of photos that are lucrative, they’ll take what they can get, show up when they’re not supposed to, and that compromises the control she was attempting to secure in the first place. Very Faustian. (Lainey Gossip)
Julia Roberts or Halle Berry? Julia Roberts has definitely unlocked her velociraptor jaw to swallow paparazzos whole, but I’ll go with Halle Berry. Halle Berry and Olivier Martinez seem like the kind of bitches who will send their “cousins” over to a pap’s house for a little street juice.
“I love hanging out with ___________ (A list celebrity/athlete who everyone in the world knows) because when he is around I get some great pussy. Really classy stuff, unlike what I usually get from my groupies. He and I have shared a lot over the years.” B+ list singer with A list name recognition talking about how he can’t wait to see the A list celebrity this weekend. (CDAN)
Yogi Berra and Tom Jones? Or Kobe Bryant and Wheelchair Jimmy?
This B list male celebrity if you like that kind of performance, and a D if you don’t, had a visit recently. Well, actually our celebrity and his live-in B list celebrity with A list name recognition girlfriend had a visitor. It turns out that one of the people that the B/D list celebrity had been cheating with has gotten herself in the family way. It will be very interesting to see if our celebrity couple are seen together at a big event this weekend where he is expected to attend. (CDAN)
The “big event” I’m guessing is the Billboard Musical Awards, so maybe this is about Whiz Khalifa and Amber Rose? Or that dude from fun. and Lena Dunham?
Dlisted – Be Very Afraid
Which former boybander, who likes to trash his former father-in-law, better be careful about upsetting his former wife?
After he recently bashed his ex-in-law, his ex-wife has told friends she’ll come to her dad’s defense–telling pals that her ex-man may have a big mouth, but he has a small penis! (Naughty But Nice Rob)
This is the opposite of blind and it’s obviously supposed to be about Nick Lachey. No question mark needed. If it is true, then it really isn’t a big deal (not punned on purpose), because what Nick lacks in peen he makes up for in tits!
I can tell you that there’s a girl who’s pregnant and even though she says she says that her steady is the father, she’s really not sure it’s not one of her co-stars, who sleeps with almost all their colleagues and with whom she used to bootycall on the regular. Depends on what the mouth looks like when the baby comes. Does that help a little? (Lainey Gossip via Blind Gossip)
Kim Kardashian and Bruce Jenner! Or Heather Morris and Chord Overstreet? If she pops out a giant set of lips covered in blond hair, Maury won’t need to step in.
Which celebrity couple, whom recent had an ugly split, is not being totally honest – the two of them have agreed to pretend to be “at war” with each other to add a little drama, and a lot of attention to the otherwise dull story.
“They are both genius when it comes to PR. They know a seemingly ugly divorce will get both of them a lot of attention, which they both love, plus, it will make them both a lot more money in the long run,” one friend of the couple’s explains.
“The two of them still live together and have dinner together most nights, however, whenever they are in public they pretend they have no contact with the other person,” adds another pal. “These two have both worked out how to make a lot of money from being famous and have no plans to stop now. After they officially get divorced they will both be laughing all the way to the bank – together.”
The joke is on us! (Naughty But Nice Rob)
Bethenny Frankelstein and Jason Hoppy?
This B list mostly television actress with A list name recognition from a very hit cable show is set to announce her divorce when she is hidden away filming the next season of her show. She does not want to answer any questions which would seem to mean there is a third person involved. (CDAN)
The only thing I’ve got is billionaire Julia Louis-Dreyfus?
This A list mostly movie actress says that she wants to get divorced, but does not want to be the bad person so has tried to set up her celebrity husband and get him to cheat with women she has hired. The problem is her husband is so dumb that he believes his wife actually loves him. (CDAN)
Not Goopy, because Goopy is the perfect woman and NOBODY cheats on Goopy. So Julia Roberts?
Dlisted – Be Very Afraid
This B-/C+ list actress/former reality star found some guy worth millions about 5 minutes into the [Met Gala] and then literally held on to him the entire night and told someone she had to go to the bathroom so bad but was afraid he would find someone else or leave if she went to the bathroom. She held it and held on to him and left with him at the end of the night. (CDAN)
Julianne Hough? Since her contract with Ryan Seacrest ended, she has to find another sugar daddy who will buy her 0,000 worth of jewelry that will mysteriously disappear from her car. But if she wants to get into the gold digging game, she needs to come prepared. What kind of gold digger doesn’t wear diapers when hunting for her next benefactor?
Wearing a diaper while hunting for gold is a must for two reasons: 1) You’ll never have to leave his side, so he won’t go searching for another trick and; 2) If he’s really boring and talks way too much, you can pee in your diaper and the look of serene relief that covers your face will make him think that you’re really into him.
Pampers are an important tool for gold diggers!
The 1% love to date each other. Actors, singers, dancers, directors, business people, and athletes, all play musical partners with each other. There is a case of one couple, though, that is about to get ugly, and one will certainly want revenge on the other.
She is a top film actress. He is a businessman with a penchant for photography. He has always been a bit obsessed with using the human body in his work. He is especially into women’s breasts. Given that she is known for her voluptuous figure, it is not surprising that he found her attractive. Actually, almost everyone finds her attractive. Young, blonde, busty, nice, talented. What’s not to like?
While they were together, he took photos of her. Lots of photos. Now, we’re not talking about photos of her riding the Staten Island Ferry. We’re talking about nude photos of her in various seductive poses.
What happened to those photos when they broke up late last year? He kept them. And they are now making the rounds of the New York business community.
His justification: “They’re art!”
She would likely disagree. While they might have been “art” when he was taking them, as soon as he started showing them around, they became “porn”. She is going to throw a fit when she finds out. (Blind Gossip)
ScarJo and that Nate Naylor dude? But haven’t we already met ScarJo’s nipples before?
This almost A list mostly movie actress who deserves to be about a C and would be if not for a franchise was wasted out of her mind [at the Met Gala] and people swore they were getting a contact high just being next to her. (CDAN)
Kristen Stewart? Duh. I’m sure they were getting contact high, because the clouds of carbon dioxide that she exhales have at least 25% THC in them.
This sexy actor has been married to his beautiful actress wife for several years.
Last year, a month or two after one of his movies opened, he and a group of his friends (including another well-known actor he’s been known to wrestle around with) visited a bar in New York City. Our actor pointed out a couple of girls to one of his friends, and the friend approached the girls with a proposition.
“Do you recognize my friend over there? He picked you out. He wants to know if you two will have a threesome with him.”
The girls immediately recognized the actor, but were not impressed. “First of all, we’re sisters, so that’s really gross. Secondly, isn’t he married?”
The friend went back to the actor, and they conferred for a minute or two before the friend returned. “Yes, but he doesn’t understand why that would be a problem.”
At that moment, some other women in the bar recognized the actor, and began to create a scene. As the actor and his friends scrambled to quickly leave the bar, the actor had these departing words for the sisters: “Your loss!”
His wife is very pregnant right now. We wonder if she knows that her husband is unfaithful. And into threesomes. And into picking up strangers in bars. (Blind Gossip)
Channing Tatum and Mark Ruffalo? But I’m having a hard time picturing Mark Ruffalo as Channing Tatum’s coochie wrangler….
Dlisted – Be Very Afraid
No one wants to work with Hollywood’s most difficult mother. She now has a reputation among child care agencies for being the most unpopular celebrity nanny employer and many now only send to her the nannies on their staff who specialise in dealing with mega bitch moms.
She is surprisingly less organised than you would think, often requesting services with no lead time and expecting to be offered priority treatment. When the nanny arrives, she often won’t speak to the person directly, communicating via her assistant, and often implying that the person isn’t attractive enough, and because of this, may or may not sell her out. Because only ugly people compromise confidentiality, I guess?
She confiscates cell phones. She also demands to go through the nanny’s private messages. After a dinner party once, when she and her friends were particularly mouthy, backstabbing several prominent actors and actresses, she demanded to search the nanny who had stayed late — without prior notice — so as to make sure she wasn’t bugged and threatened legal action for no reason. Speaking of working hours, she has been known to require extra time but isn’t willing to pay for it, rationalising her request by blaming the person for an imaginary offensive — like missing diapers or a bent branch/stem in the garden. Ie. “I notice that the whatever bush over there looks a little trampled. You weren’t careful enough. You are staying an extra two hours.”
She is known to be verbally abusive and impatient. She once watched a nanny pick up spilled baby food all over the floor while tapping her hand on the counter and criticising the person’s physique and intellect as the reason for why it was taking so long. Many nannies in LA, hearing horror stories from their peers, have turned potential work placements with her because they don’t want to bother with the drama.
Not Jennifer Garner. (Lainey Gossip)
Sharon Stone, Jessica Alba, Goopy Paltrow or Halle Berry?
It’s probably not Sharon Stone, because if she doesn’t like what a nanny’s doing, she skins that ho with her nails and turns that nanny hide into a pair of boots and a matching purse. It’s probably not Goopy Paltrow, because she doesn’t hire American nannies. She has hers imported from her homeland Britain. So I’ll guess either MiserAlba or Halle Berry?
This former A lister of you define A list as the number of times you get in a tabloid for bad behavior and arrests, but more known for her rapping and interesting name has a new profession. well, not so new. She used to hook before she got famous and her ex now has her on his string again. She is his biggest earner from a select clientele. She is open to anything as long as at the end of the day she gets her fix. I can’t believe with her bad luck that she has not been arrested for it yet. (CDAN)
It has been a long time since there was a multiple choice in one of the blind items. I think I have done it previously, but honestly, don’t remember when. When the Tony Awards were announced, one of the names below went ballistic when they found out they had not been nominated. The person yelled at their agent and then manager and then someone very close to them and said some of the most vile things you could ever imagine. I knew they had a temper, but not like this.
I know you are all thinking Alec Baldwin so you can eliminate him, because, although he might have gone crazy, he is not the one I know about for this. (CDAN)
Kate Holmes’ emotional scale doesn’t jump past ……., so she’s out. I don’t even know if Jim Parsons has the ability to yell at a trick, so he’s out. ScarJo is too bland to come up with vile, filthy shit on her own, so she’s out. That leaves Bette Midler and Jessica Chastain. I’ll go with Bette Midler. She should’ve recorded that meltdown and sent it to the Tony committee. Bitch might’ve gotten an honorary Tony for that performance.
Dlisted – Be Very Afraid
Which beautiful celebrity who has always been known for her gorgeous looks, although maybe never more than as she has grown older, has a dirty little beauty secrets that she never talks about.
She is always happy to pass on advice about diet and exercise, however the one beauty tip this star doesn’t want the public to know about is that she has been getting colonics for years.
She has “pooped” years away, without saying a word. Only her closest friends and family know about her real tip for staying thin and getting great looking skin – and of course those that have seen her exiting a certain “spa” on Spring Street in New York. A place that is not unknown to many celebrities included one that popped a tube into the bottom of someone who once declared they were the – “king of the world.” (Naughty But Nice Rob)
Maybe this is too obvious, but my only guess is Goopy Paltrow? Anybody who has ever read GOOP knows that it should be called POOP, because she’s obsessed with caca. When she’s not shitting from her butt, she’s shitting from her mouth. If she was on Pee-wee’s Playhouse and said that she loves poop, he’d tell her that if she loves it so much she should marry it and she would. If only she could get colonics on her mouth too.
And the “king of the world” dude is obviously Leonardo DiCaprio. Maybe he’s so happy in this picture, because he just got all the poop sucked out of him.
Many people think that this celebrity is gay. Let us set you straight on this. He is not gay. He is actually bisexual. Sort of. Yes, it’s complicated.
In public, he only dates beautiful women. Although he is nice to them, spends time with them, and spends money on them, he rarely has sex with them. And then there are only two rules: He can see any man he wants on the side, but she is allowed to date only him. And, after the relationship is over, she had better keep quiet.
He has sex with both men and women, but it’s not frequent or intense or especially satisfying, and it’s never as part of a long-term, committed relationship. The women he dates aren’t even sure of their role. They are not sure if they are his beard, his pal, his prop, or his real girlfriend. His exes all describe him the same way. “He is not totally gay, but we only had sex a couple of times. It’s not even like he is bisexual. It’s more like he is asexual.”
Even more interesting is the way that two past girlfriends described what it was like having sex with him. One said he was “bunny fast.” Another described it as “like being poked with an annoying rubber pencil.”
With ringing endorsements like that, why do women date him or stay with him? He’s good looking. And famous. And very rich. And very connected. Too bad that last trait hasn’t helped too many of them progress further in the industry.
So, in conclusion, he is either gay or straight or bisexual or asexual. The women he dates are either his beards, his pals, his props, or his real girlfriends.That clears things right up, doesn’t it? (Blind Gossip)
George Clooney or Ryan Seacrest? The “bunny fast” and “rubber pencil” comments make me think that it’s Ryan Seacrest, because I wouldn’t be surprise if his peen is an actual rubber pencil. And he has to bone like a bunny on meth, because he has 500 jobs to get back to.
Which theatrical pop star who has been taking time off to heal from a physical inquiry has also been battling an addiction problem – and checked into a rehab center.
One witness says the person was almost unrecognizable without all the costumes, wigs and makeup. But was serious about getting help.
In the past this person has admitted using drugs and drinking, but didn’t want the fact that they went to get treatment to be announced, so they did it undercover while the public and press were focusing on a different medical issue. (Naughty But Nice Rob)
The bearding just became too much for this celebrity. You would have a tough time guessing her name, but she recently split with her gorgeous B list mostly movie actor “boyfriend,” because he has pretty much given up on even pretending they are in a relationship and she didn’t want to be dating him when he officially comes out. Considering what he has been doing the past two weeks, it should not be long before he does. (CDAN)
Chris Pine recently broke up with a piece whose name I’d never guess, but I never figured that his b-hole twitches for peen and I usually think everybody is gay.
For the first time that I can remember, this former almost A list mostly television actress who has had some roles in some great movies but is best remembered for a hit show or two she was on, showed up to an event with her girlfriend on her arm. Well, not on her arm, but with her which is a first. She didn’t talk about it and they didn’t kiss, but there was some hand holding and a lot of affection. Good for her. I hope she comes out. (CDAN)
I was going to say Donna Mills, Deidre Hall or Morgan Fairchild, but all of them are forever A-list.
And now for a blind item from The Daily Beast’s article on women pooping at work:
A popular national morning TV show host in her 40s—who, like most others interviewed in this story, asked to remain nameless to avoid embarrassment—said that she walks 10 minutes to another section of her midtown office building to do it, and still then only does it when no one in the hallway sees her en route. (via Gawker)
I really wish this was about Kathie Lee Gifford, but she’s beyond her 40s and she’d shit in a cup in the middle of the street during rush hour, because drunks don’t care. I’ll say it’s Savannah Guthrie. I mean, she has to look at Matt Lauer’s face close-up all morning and that’ll make anyone’s butt explode constantly.
Dlisted – Be Very Afraid