This is why you should always dip your contacts (which are basically condoms for your eyes) in liquid antibiotics and put that shit on your eyeballs before you turn on the internet.
Everybody at last night’s Scary Movie 5 premiere in Hollywood now know what scientists see when they look at pus from a popped syphilis pimple under a microscope. Charlie Sheen kept the free clinic in business by planting his lips on Lindsay Lohan’s face as they posed on the red carpet. Shortly after that picture was taken, the left side of bitch’s face started to droop, because it saw what was happening to the right side and it was trying to slip out of there before it was too late. But besides LiLo’s half-melted face, she actually looks kind of good for LiLo. Charlie Sheen on the other hand looks like burnt egg whites in a beaver wig.
And of course, LiLo was late and showed up 30 minutes before the red carpet ended. LiLo’s excuse was that she was at the dentist, which is a totally valid excuse. LiLo figures that since she’s going to Coachella this weekend, she’s probably going to booze her veneers off, so she got a new set made and they’ll be ready on Monday. LiLo is always thinking ahead.
Dlisted – Be Very Afraid
Tags:
Aaaaaaand,
Eyes,
Gonorrhea,
We've These celebs are so seksiiii!
How could we have forgotten about them??
They need to step their fine asses back into the spotlight!! LOLz!
CLICK HERE to view the gallery “Seksiest Celebs We’ve Totally Forgotten About!”
CLICK HERE to view the gallery “Seksiest Celebs We’ve Totally Forgotten About!”
CLICK HERE to view the gallery “Seksiest Celebs We’ve Totally Forgotten About!”
CLICK HERE to view the gallery “Seksiest Celebs We’ve Totally Forgotten About!”
CLICK HERE to view the gallery “Seksiest Celebs We’ve Totally Forgotten About!”
CLICK HERE to view the gallery “Seksiest Celebs We’ve Totally Forgotten About!”
[Image via Mavrix Online.]
PerezHilton
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We've Two weird things happened on VanityFair.com a few days ago. First, Vanity Fair actually interviewed Carson Daly in the year 2012. Second, Vanity Fair’s George Wayne, who’s thing is to try to shock the butt plug right out of his interviewees, asked Carson the question most of us ask ourselves when we wake up in the morning: When Xtina gets the fuck tingles in a major way, does she squirt like a geyser? Yes, Vanity Fair went there:
G.W. Let’s cut to the chase: Do you think Christina Aguilera squirts when she has an orgasm?
C.D. Are you kidding me? Is that your opener? I have no idea. I can’t imagine the thought. I mean, really.
G.W. I mean, clearly—just look at the outfits she chooses to wear onstage. Tell that girl to put some clothes on! I believe that is a rational question to ask you. I know it is a bit off-piste.
C.D. Yes, it is. I will say she does have a lot of people on her team, a whole entourage to help her, and she knows what she is doing. Oh boy, I love you. You are the best. You are so great—just the best. Despite your asinine question about Christina, it is still a pleasure to be here with you.
Wait, so according to George Wayne, if you wear four-sizes-too-small leather panties onstage, your sex parts will squirt like a walrus spitting water when you orgasm offstage later? No wonder I always stop for a few seconds and say “hmmmm” to myself when I see leather man panties in the window of some store on 8th Street.
And you know what I really didn’t need today? The image of Xtina squirting up into Carson Daly’s nostrils. That’s not what I needed, so screw that GW bitch for that.
Dlisted – Be Very Afraid
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Milla Jovovich is going from calendar girl to Avon lady now that she’s the face of the beauty brand’s latest fragrance City Rush for Her!
The actress looked amazing as she posed around the city of Manhattan with model Carlos Casia Grande, the face of City Rush for Him.
Milla says of the new fragrance:
“I am so excited to be working with Avon as the face of their new fragrance. It is a sophisticated fragrance that captures the natural mystery and sensuality of a woman. When I am wearing City Rush I feel confident, sexy, and ready to turn the streets into my runway.”
If U want to turn the streets into your own runway AND smell sophisticated while doing so, the fragrance goes on sale in October!
[Image via Avon]
CocoPerez
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Michelle Williams gave us a serious case of deja vu at the US-Ireland Alliance Oscar Wilde pre-Academy Awards party on Thursday night.
The actress stepped on to the green carpet in a black and white Givenchy sheath dress that was nearly identical to the Victoria, Victoria Beckham dress she wore to BAFTA tea party in January.
She even wore similar black heels!
This makes us nervous to see what Michelle wears to the Academy Awards this weekend.
[Image via B.Dowling/WENN.]
CocoPerez
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William's With our buddy Keenan!
So fun!
Check it out (above)!
P.S. It was our song choice! Hope Adam and Xtina like!
PerezHilton
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